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Planning a Common Law Wedding

When I suggested the idea of a large wedding reception for my domestic partner and me to my accountant he offered that common law marriages were more common than you might think.  After all, it saves on paper.   No need for that pesty  wedding certificate.  No need to skip the service at before the reception either.

In point of legal fact, California State does not recognize common law marriage.  But after 'shacking up' for a long time most people my age (born  in  the fifties),generally feel like you're married anyway.  So why not have a wedding reception?  Keep the catering business alive here in LA, which is where Marlyn and I live. Its also important to keep some aspects of our life together conventional.

Like everything else, we figured we'll go to the web for how to get married advise and checklist stuff - but it doesn't really apply to a common law wedding. The web site said things like:

.

Ceremony Site

Decide on what type of ceremony venue

you want

Select a ceremony site

or

Officiant

Select an officiant and lock in the date

Create ceremony

Rehearse ceremony

or

Marriage License and Requirements

Research and meet local marriage

license requirements.

Obtain a marriage license.

And you know how this Internet stuff is, if you skip a step the screen keeps repeating itself with little red dots.  No, this wasn't going to work that way;  it was clear that no one was giving out free advise for what we needed to do so we either needed to start and new web site or write some of our own rules of the road.

For example - it's probably not necessary that the bride wear white.  The role of the groom had even more subtle challenges - take for example this dilemma we uncovered at a wedding etiquette site called 'Life123.com'

  "one of the more fun events of the day is the garter toss. If you are incorporating this fun and celebrated tradition into the reception, there are definitely some things that you should and should not do. The garter toss is symbolic of the groom tossing off his old life and passing good luck on to whoever catches it. The bride should be seated and have the garter just above her knee. Be careful to lift the dress just enough to access the garter and not exposing anything else. After removing the garter, you can turn your back to the cluster of unmarried men and fling it backwards. Under no circumstances should you remove the garter with your teeth, unless you are supremely confident that no one in the crowd, including your future father-in-law, would be upset."

I probably don't want to remove Marlyn's garter belt with my teeth - the teeth might come out of my head if I do. And Marlyn's 86 year old Dad would either have a heart attack or die laughing.
(to be continued)

Common Law Nuptials -Story ideas

Common Law Nuptials

you know your broke when:

a day at the domestic partner register:

how to have a common law wedding reception:

maybe 'common law' but not trailer trash
FAMILY.CODE
SECTION 297-297.5

297.  (a) Domestic partners are two adults who have chosen to share
one another's lives in an intimate and committed relationship of
mutual caring.
   (b) A domestic partnership shall be established in California when
both persons file a Declaration of Domestic Partnership with the
Secretary of State pursuant to this division, and, at the time of
filing, all of the following requirements are met:
   (1) Both persons have a common residence.
   (2) Neither person is married to someone else or is a member of
another domestic partnership with someone else that has not been
terminated, dissolved, or adjudged a nullity.
   (3) The two persons are not related by blood in a way that would
prevent them from being married to each other in this state.
   (4) Both persons are at least 18 years of age.
   (5) Either of the following:
   (A) Both persons are members of the same sex.
   (B) One or both of the persons meet the eligibility criteria under
Title II of the Social Security Act as defined in 42 U.S.C. Section
402(a) for old-age insurance benefits or Title XVI of the Social
Security Act as defined in 42 U.S.C. Section 1381 for aged
individuals. Notwithstanding any other provision of this section,
persons of opposite sexes may not constitute a domestic partnership
unless one or both of the persons are over the age of 62.
   (6) Both persons are capable of consenting to the domestic
partnership.
   (c) "Have a common residence" means that both domestic partners
share the same residence. It is not necessary that the legal right to
possess the common residence be in both of their names. Two people
have a common residence even if one or both have additional
residences. Domestic partners do not cease to have a common residence
if one leaves the common residence but intends to return.



297.5.  (a) Registered domestic partners shall have the same rights,
protections, and benefits, and shall be subject to the same
responsibilities, obligations, and duties under law, whether they
derive from statutes, administrative regulations, court rules,
government policies, common law, or any other provisions or sources
of law, as are granted to and imposed upon spouses.
   (b) Former registered domestic partners shall have the same
rights, protections, and benefits, and shall be subject to the same
responsibilities, obligations, and duties under law, whether they
derive from statutes, administrative regulations, court rules,
government policies, common law, or any other provisions or sources
of law, as are granted to and imposed upon former spouses.
   (c) A surviving registered domestic partner, following the death
of the other partner, shall have the same rights, protections, and
benefits, and shall be subject to the same responsibilities,
obligations, and duties under law, whether they derive from statutes,
administrative regulations, court rules, government policies, common
law, or any other provisions or sources of law, as are granted to
and imposed upon a widow or a widower.
   (d) The rights and obligations of registered domestic partners
with respect to a child of either of them shall be the same as those
of spouses. The rights and obligations of former or surviving
registered domestic partners with respect to a child of either of
them shall be the same as those of former or surviving spouses.
   (e) To the extent that provisions of California law adopt, refer
to, or rely upon, provisions of federal law in a way that otherwise
would cause registered domestic partners to be treated differently
than spouses, registered domestic partners shall be treated by
California law as if federal law recognized a domestic partnership in
the same manner as California law.
   (f) Registered domestic partners shall have the same rights
regarding nondiscrimination as those provided to spouses.
   (g) No public agency in this state may discriminate against any
person or couple on the ground that the person is a registered
domestic partner rather than a spouse or that the couple are
registered domestic partners rather than spouses, except that nothing
in this section applies to modify eligibility for long-term care
plans pursuant to Chapter 15 (commencing with Section 21660) of Part
3 of Division 5 of Title 2 of the Government Code.
   (h) This act does not preclude any state or local agency from
exercising its regulatory authority to implement statutes providing
rights to, or imposing responsibilities upon, domestic partners.
   (i) This section does not amend or modify any provision of the
California Constitution or any provision of any statute that was
adopted by initiative.
   (j) Where necessary to implement the rights of registered domestic
partners under this act, gender-specific terms referring to spouses
shall be construed to include domestic partners.
   (k) (1) For purposes of the statutes, administrative regulations,
court rules, government policies, common law, and any other provision
or source of law governing the rights, protections, and benefits,
and the responsibilities, obligations, and duties of registered
domestic partners in this state, as effectuated by this section, with
respect to community property, mutual responsibility for debts to
third parties, the right in particular circumstances of either
partner to seek financial support from the other following the
dissolution of the partnership, and other rights and duties as
between the partners concerning ownership of property, any reference
to the date of a marriage shall be deemed to refer to the date of
registration of a domestic partnership with the state.
   (2) Notwithstanding paragraph (1), for domestic partnerships
registered with the state before January 1, 2005, an agreement
between the domestic partners that the partners intend to be governed
by the requirements set forth in Sections 1600 to 1620, inclusive,
and which complies with those sections, except for the agreement's
effective date, shall be enforceable as provided by Sections 1600 to
1620, inclusive, if that agreement was fully executed and in force as
of June 30, 2005.

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